**Warning** If you live in a fantasy world where a Pastor lives on a pedestal and never struggles in life you may not want to read this post.

Do you ever lack faith?  I do.  

I struggle with faith at times.  More often than I’d like to admit, I have to battle negative thoughts.  My most recent took place this past Sunday.

Sunday Morning I woke up to an overcast day.  I made my way to Port City Java to pray and review my message.  All was good.

Around 8:30am the sky turned dark and monsoon like conditions rolled in.  That was when I started to struggle.  Here are the thoughts that were going through my head:

In a matter of minutes I had completely taken my eyes of Jesus and focused on everything that could go wrong.  My faith TANKED!  I felt like Peter who was enthusiastically walking on water one minute and then drowning the next.
I’ve spent more time treading water than I’d like to admit.  However, what I’ve come to find out is that the times I am struggling the most are often the times God moves the most.  Satan wouldn’t try to discourage you if you weren’t about to experience something amazing.  As a matter of fact,  I can recall many Sunday’s when everything appeared to go wrong and yet God rocked the place.
I find great comfort in the fact that in those moments of sinking that God is not far away.  Just like Peter I call out, “Lord Save Me!” and immediately he pulls me up and asks “why did you doubt me?”
I’m learning to trust…but I still struggle…I hope this doesn’t disappoint you!

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Comments (8)

Jeff, you are only human like the rest of us. Life is going to throw curve balls at you too now and then, and it’s quite possible that the devil tries to interfere with Pastors & other very spiritual people MORE than others simply for the fact that he knows you are special, loved & respected by many, counted on, looked up to & most importantly, because you bring so many lives to Jesus! Therefore, he is going to put struggles & doubts in your mind at time, but just as you did Sunday… focus on God & put it all in his hands. He is already doing great things with you!

Thank you for sharing your heart, and thank you for all you do at Lifepoint. We couldn’t imagine ever going anywhere else! And even with all the rain last Sunday, Mother’s Day still rocked! I loved the first series of building strong families!

Thanks again! See you Sunday!
Lisa

Lisa Smith added these kind words on May 15 08 at 10:35 am

wow, jeff! that was an awesome post! it’s in our weakness that He is strong! that is a lesson that often takes a lifetime to learn but we are all learning it slowly but surely. keep looking up!

karen added these kind words on May 15 08 at 11:19 am

Sunday’s message was awesome Jeff! I’m keeping my notes on that one for a loonnng time & will always look back on them esp. when Bradley and I start a family.

Jill added these kind words on May 15 08 at 11:20 am

Jeff, Jesus was perfect in everyway. We are the reason that he gave us a chance by forgiving us, so we can move on to positive. We are tested all the time because we are struggling to do God’s will. I am struggling with my goals and family problems everyday, it has been a challenge lately, and I know that maybe I should talk to you, for if God is showing me that we all have hard times struggling with our daily goals, we should listen and pray together for strength to carry us on to do God’s will.

Dar added these kind words on May 15 08 at 11:38 am

Nothing wrong with that! You are being Real! That rocks! Like Joe told me, sometimes you have to ‘fake it, till you make it’! I know things aren’t always easy, but dude, you always pull through it in some way. I look up to you… you’re an awesome pastor and friend. Leading a church has to be hard, I would never be able to do it… but you do! You do good work, you truly care about people! Look at where I was and where I am now!! No longer in Ocean Isle Beach, I have a good job, my car is running and I have a place to live!! The only way that happend, was with you guys help! I love you Jeff!! When your having one of them days….just think back on all the stories that have happend because you were there to help, cause you cared, because Lifepoint was there. Heck, if you weren’t here and Lifepoint didn’t exist, I would have probably been done a long time ago!! Thanks Jeff!

Erin added these kind words on May 15 08 at 11:49 am

I would have been done a long time ago too Jeff. My life has turned completely around since I started attending Lifepoint. Both Michelle and Karen knew what I mess I was when I first came. My husband has seen such a huge difference in me that he wants it too, but is too afraid he will be rejected somehow. He is going to come on Sunday and I can’t wait to hear what message you have for us next! I saw your homeless buddy in church last Sunday. That’s so awesome! God is using you in so many ways and you just can’t give up now! YOU CAN DO IT, PUT YOUR BACK INTO IT!!!

Loretta added these kind words on May 15 08 at 2:17 pm

Stop talking about me man:) Great post…by the way, thanks for the information about ARC from our discussions, I’m going to get down to a roundtable in June or August.

Mark Rouse added these kind words on May 15 08 at 3:10 pm

So I’m not the only one who has those thoughts on a Sunday morning?

Marty added these kind words on May 17 08 at 1:04 pm

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